8am: It’s a new day, new me, fresh start. I’ve agreed with my agency to colour my hair for a new ‘image’ that will hopefully boost my earning potential. Two years ago I cut my hair to shoulder length and earned a year’s salary in three months. Modelling is a fickle industry, I tell you! Today I am booked into a salon that has offered me a free colour in exchange for two Instagram posts. Mad.
10am: I get cash out for a tip and buy a packet of crisps (as I’ve forgotten to eat breakfast at home again) and a magazine from the vendor at Warwick Avenue station. £23.50
1pm: I buy a travel coffee mug online to save my funds. And the world. £10.99
2pm: The hairdresser has worked for four hours (!!) on my hair so I tip her £20.
3pm: I feel really excited at the prospect of a fresh start. I’ve recently moved agencies, and after working for 10 years as a model in London, it’s hard to stay afloat and ‘seen’ as the industry grows and is increasingly saturated with younger, cooler models, especially those with the power of 30k Instagram followers behind them. My plan is to earn enough through modelling for the next couple of years to be able to transition smoothly into another job and to keep my head above water with my mortgage and bills – it’s overwhelming to say the least. So for now I’ll be excited about the reaction my new ‘do’ gets from my clients. As mad as that sounds, it really is how the industry works, and I’m slowly beginning to see that my career isn’t actually over, and that maybe I’ll be okay again.
3.30pm: I run into Topshop to buy a top to wear for when I have new pictures taken at my agency. Hurry into the changing rooms with 10 items and dance in the mirror, then hand it all over to the shop assistant at the end who is clearly livid with me. I find a top in the sale for £4 (winner).
4pm: Today is very much a salt and vinegar crisps day. £0.70
5.30pm: Between 5 and 6pm I usually find out what I’m doing the next day. This is known as ‘check in’ time and it means you can’t really make plans ever, but it also keeps you on your toes and I am slightly addicted to the lack of routine. I call my agent and find out I’ve booked a job from a casting last week! AHH! I’m shooting a campaign for a bag company in Chelsea.
6pm: It’s been a really nice day, so I cook my favourite meal: prawn linguine. I buy prawns and tomatoes, lemons and rocket in Sainsbury’s – £4.75 – and eat it while watching Broad City. I feel positive about what might or could happen in the future. I’m blissed out on what ifs for the first time in forever instead of being terrified of them.
9.30pm. I go to bed early as I’m an insomniac and usually spend a couple of hours in bed wired with thoughts before sleep finally arrives.